


Cause We Hunt You Down Without Mercy, Hunt You Down All Nightmare Long

by destielsdessert



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Post-Episode: s01e06 Countrycide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:21:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25589794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destielsdessert/pseuds/destielsdessert
Summary: The one where Ianto has nightmares following the events of Brecon Beacons, and things just go downhill from there.
Relationships: Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones
Comments: 7
Kudos: 103





	Cause We Hunt You Down Without Mercy, Hunt You Down All Nightmare Long

_3:52 am._

Ianto turns over in his bed and sighs, the sound loud in the otherwise silent room. He has been awake for the last hour, too exhausted to get out of bed but fully aware that he won't be falling back asleep any time soon. This has been a common occurrence the past week and a half, and he's honestly not sure when it will end. When he will be able to get through the night _sleeping_ rather than just resting for a couple of hours before the nightmares inevitably wake him.

Tonight he didn't even manage a couple of hours before he woke up screaming and sweating. And he can feel the residual ache, the exhaustion filling every small part of him but he can't- he _can't_ sleep, not with the nightmares still fresh in his mind.

It's not as if he can go to work yet, though. Even for him, four o'clock in the morning is extreme. Jack will be awake, and he has been a lot more clingy since what happened at the Brecon Beacons. It's sort of overwhelming. They've been working for some time to work through everything that happened with Lisa and things are by no means perfect, but there is a newfound peace between them, one that is for once built on truth. Ianto isn't hiding anything.

Well, at least nothing as huge as _that_.

Jack, for one, seems to be past it. Or at least, he seems to be trying to get past it. Ianto can tell that sometimes he struggles and he is by no means surprised. Any trust between them had been destroyed that night, and Ianto knows that he is to blame. Mostly. But their trust is being built up again slowly and in some ways, they are closer than they were before.

That doesn't mean that Ianto has to tell Jack _everything_ , though.

So going into work at 4 am isn't an option. Because Jack will be awake, and he'll ask questions that Ianto doesn't have the strength to answer right now. It's not exactly something he's really open to sharing - 'oh, you know, just having endless nightmares about being tied up and almost _eaten_ last week so i'd rather be here at work thanks'. And Jack will ask questions because of course he'd choose now to actually start investing some interest in Ianto's life.

(And Ianto is annoyed even though he literally called Jack out for _not_ taking an interest just a few months ago.)

But he can't lay in bed for the rest of time, as much as he'd maybe like to. He hasn't the energy to deal with the day that is looming ahead but boy, is laying here not helping, either. It's just reminding him that as exhausted as he is, as much as he _wants_ to sleep he also really doesn't want to sleep because he doesn't need to see _blood_ and _baseball bats_ and _refrigerators full of human body parts_ \- namely, Ianto's body parts.

With the little energy he has, Ianto pushes himself upright and from there it's just a tiny bit easier to force himself out of bed. His vision fills with floating black dots for a few long seconds once he's standing and he blinks furiously to get rid of them, his eyes burning with the effort. The first thing he needs is a hot drink - namely, coffee. He has been drinking coffee almost non-stop for the past week and even for him, it's a lot. He knows at this point, caffeine barely affects him but _anything_ to keep him awake as long as possible. The coffee will also help with the chill of the early morning air that seems to be taking over his flat.

His kitchen seems miles away as he stumbles towards it but eventually he makes it there. His body sways as he stops in front of the coffee machine, protesting against having to be upright because Ianto does not have enough energy for this but Ianto pushes through it, something he has been working on for the past week. He can fight through it. He has to. His world can't come to a halt because of a little trouble sleeping.

The coffee machine takes far too long to make his coffee. His eyes are still burning and he makes the mistake of reaching for the light switch to turn on the light. For a moment, all he sees is white. He squeezes his eyes shut tight with a quiet groan and gives himself a minute to slowly blink his eyes back open as he adjusts. His eyes burn more now, watering also.

Ianto doesn't dwell on it. His coffee is ready now and he heads into the living room, turning the light on behind himself. A glance at the clock tells him he spent a little longer in bed before actually getting up than he thought, as it is now 4:23. If he drinks his coffee slowly and then gets ready, perhaps he can head to work sooner than he had hoped.

All he knows is Jack can't turn him away, not really. Not if Ianto is willing to work and he doesn't give Jack a reason to think he isn't capable.

Ianto sits on the couch, coffee in hand, and turns on the TV. It being 4:24 in the morning, there isn't much on so he flicks over to reruns of classic shows and tries to focus on it. It doesn't work and he quickly finds himself distracted by the heat of the mug in his hands. The warmth is welcoming, comforting, beckoning him back towards sleep. His eyes droop for a moment before he blinks them back open, shaking his head to clear his thoughts. Maybe he should start getting ready for work sooner rather than later. He needs a proper focus.

Ianto sips his coffee. He wishes he could feel the effect like other people can. Realistically, he knows the caffeine has an effect, but he never really notices it. Maybe he has just gotten used to functioning on nowhere-near-enough sleep when life becomes a little fucked up.

When Ianto glances down, his mug is empty and he blinks back up at the clock - 4:39. Huh. He makes his way back into the kitchen and cleans his mug. He probably should have prolonged that a little further, because now all he can really do is get ready for work. He isn't up for sitting around watching anything on TV. Ironically, he doesn't have the energy.

He grabs a towel and some clothes on his way to the bathroom. Hopefully time will pass quicker in the shower; it usually does. He strips, deliberately avoiding the mirror. He doesn't need to see the bruises. He doesn't need to throw up so early today.

He turns the shower on as hot as he can physically bear it and steps inside, bowing his head so the water is directly hitting just between his shoulder blades. A dull ache, exactly what he needs for a distraction at the moment. He stands in that position for as long as he can bear before it feels like the water may begin to start melting a hole through his skin, and then he gets on with the actual shower part.

The shower does as much as Ianto hopes. It kick-starts his senses and as he turns the shower off and pulls the towel around his body to dry himself, he feels a little less sluggish than before. Still like he could fall asleep if he lay down on any flat surface (though he knows that will get him nowhere), but he is at least a little more steady on his feet.

He makes a point to face away from the mirror so he isn't tempted to look as he dresses. He knows the bruises are beginning to fade, but he still doesn't want to look at the reminders of his 'tenderisation'. He just wants to forget anything ever happened. That probably isn't going to happen any time soon, but at least he can distract himself with work.

Ianto grabs his tie and suit jacket from his wardrobe and pulls them on. Now he's dressed, and all that's really left to do is just go to work. He glances at the clock - 5:17. Not as bad as it could be. He could try to kill a little time on the drive to work but it's only just after five o'clock in the morning; no places are going to be open and there isn't exactly going to be much traffic anywhere.

With a sigh, Ianto begins the journey down to his car.

* * *

As predicted, Ianto only passes three other cars on the drive to work and is otherwise only stopped by traffic lights.

He takes the longest route to work but with empty streets, even that can only delay his arrival by so much. Far too soon, he's parking his car and heading into the tourist's office.

He considers staying here for a while, but that won't give him anything to do. Surely, if he goes into the Hub and Jack spots him, Jack will give him something to do, or Ianto can find something. Even if it's just cleaning desks. That'll distract him for a little while at least, especially because the others aren't here yet. This way he can tidy to his heart's content.

So Ianto heads down into the Hub, trying to decide if he wants to be able to avoid Jack for as possible or for Jack to just know he's here so he can get the potential lecture out of the way.

The only lights on in the Hub are in Jack's office, until the door rolls open for Ianto. He winces, wishing his entrance could be a little more subtle so he could at least delay Jack's awareness of his presence until he brings him his coffee.

Ianto glances over to Jack's office but the blinds are closed. Maybe he isn't awake yet. Ianto knows he doesn't sleep often, but maybe today is one of the days he can manage a whole night. He hopes at least one of them can get some rest.

A shadow moving across the window tells Ianto otherwise and with a silent sigh, he turns towards the coffee station. He needs another hit of caffeine and Jack won't say no to a coffee, would probably be annoyed if Ianto made himself a hot drink and not Jack.

The silence of the Hub unsettles Ianto. He knows he initially wanted the others to not come in until later so he could have peace to clean, but cleaning isn't so distracting when there's no one else around. And the likelihood is Jack will be shut in his office for hours to come. It'll be six o'clock soon though, and maybe Tosh will decide to come in early too, so at least Ianto won't be totally alone. Not that he wants to talk to her. He just wants someone else to be here, to remind him where he actually is.

Steaming coffees in hand, Ianto makes his way towards Jack's office. He knocks, but has no intention on waiting for an answer and just uses his elbow to push the handle down and gently nudges the door open with his shoulder.

Jack is sat at his desk, staring intently - almost glaring - at a piece of paper in front of him. If Ianto were more awake, he might make a point to quickly scan the paper to figure out what it is but as things stand, he'll be surprised if he manages a coherent conversation with Jack at this point. He'd hoped his lethargy would have faded a little more by now, but it seems to have a stronger hold on him than he'd initially thought.

Well, at least that just calls for more coffee.

Jack looks up as Ianto steps inside, and leans back in his chair, a small smile spreading across his face. Ianto finds himself returning the gesture despite his lack of energy. "Coffee, sir," he says, raising a mug for emphasis.

Jack grins as Ianto places the mug on the desk. "Never too early for a good coffee," he remarks.

Ianto swallows. He knows this is Jack's way of asking why he's here so early without actually asking, to test to see if Ianto is actually going to contribute to that conversation. He straightens himself up. He can't talk about this right now and he knows Jack won't force it out of him.

"I thought I'd clean up the main area before everyone else turns up," he begins to explain. He eyes Jack for a second, Jack's face unchanging. "Then check through the archives, unless something turns up on the rift." Jack continues to stare and Ianto tries to gauge his feelings. He must be even more tired than he thinks because Jack is almost expressionless. "If you need me, I'll be on the comms."

Jack nods once, slowly, and Ianto doesn't wait for some more excruciatingly slow conversation. It'll probably be a normal conversation to Jack, but Ianto needs something to _do_. He needs to be moving, he needs to be busy.

He has to shake this tiredness.

* * *

'Shaking tiredness' is easier said than done.

Ianto doesn't know why it feels so much worse today. Maybe it's been building up, maybe it's just that he can't get the memories out of his head for some reason. But something feels worse today than it has for the past week and it's weighing down on Ianto's shoulders and the just wants to lay down but _not sleep_ because at least with his eyes open, he can try to force the memories away.

At least the main area of the Hub is messy. It gives Ianto more to do. Except in his haste to be busy, he cleans far faster than he intends to and barely spends an hour with that to full distract him. Tosh comes in for seven, Owen for eight and Gwen for eight-thirty. By the time they're all here, the Hub is cleaner than Ianto has seen it for a long time and there wouldn't be anything to clean if he searched for it.

(Which he knows, because he tries.)

He makes another round of coffees, this time for all of them. Gwen and Owen are in the middle of some mini-argument so the atmosphere around them is kind of tense, but Ianto barely notices it as he hands them their drinks. Tosh is already typing madly on her computer and Ianto doesn't say anything to other her and just places her drink on her desk.

He doesn't have the patience for Jack right now. God, he just wants to _sleep_. But as soon as he thinks that, he almost wants to cry because he doesn't actually want to sleep. He wants to never sleep again because he can't deal with these stupid nightmares any more. It happened over a week ago. They should have stopped by now.

He doesn't knock on Jack's door. Doesn't really think to until the door is already open and by that point it doesn't matter, because Jack has barely moved. The piece of paper has transformed into a messy pile and there's a logo at the top, but Ianto doesn't care to look at it. If Jack needs anything he'll ask, and Ianto can't find it in himself to question what the papers are for.

He sets Jack's much down on the desk harder than he intends, apparently, because a little spills over the sides. He mumbles out a faint apology as Jack watches him and grabs a cloth to wipe up the spillage.

Ianto leaves without another word, feeling Jack's eyes watching him as he shuts the door behind himself. He has to get a grip. Jack won't ask questions if Ianto doesn't give him too much of a reason to, but if he keeps going like this Jack _will_ want to know what's going on. Ianto wants to hate him for it, but he also kind of wants to love him for it.

He just forces those thoughts from his mind.

His stint in the archives doesn't last as long as he wants it to, either. He spends ten minutes staring at one file trying to make out what it says, his eyes are so blurry. He blinks and blinks but eventually gives up because he's just becoming lightheaded.

He at least opens all the drawers and neatens all the files as he tries to figure out what else he could do. Save for something coming up on the rift, there's not much he can think of. He sighs as he slams the final drawer shut, unsure if he wants to let his frustrations take over. He could really do with letting off some steam, but he doesn't exactly have the energy to spare.

" _Ianto! Weevil sighting fifteen minutes from here. You in?_ "

Ianto sighs again, rubbing his forehead. _Not now, Jack_. "Yeah," he says before he can stop himself. "Yeah, just give me a minute."

He considers throwing his comm across the room and pretending he lost it and that Jack was hearing things because a Weevil hunt? Ianto doesn't think he's up for that.

As he heads up the stairs back to the main Hub a dizzy spell hits him. His vision blacks out for a second and he leans against the bannister for support as he struggles to get his bearings. He breathes in, then out, then in, then out.

After his vision clears, he hesitates. Maybe a Weevil hunt with Jack isn't actually a good idea. If he can't even manage a journey up the stairs, what use is he going to be when hunting a Weevil?

Sighing for a third time, Ianto decides to just suck it up. He isn't a child, he can handle a lack of sleep. Even if it's lack of sleep over the course of more than a week that has just been getting worse the more time passes. He can still do his job. He has to, or else Jack will start asking questions and Ianto doesn't need anyone looking after him. It's not as if Jack can make this stop, anyway.

" _Ianto? Am I gonna have to find a new hunting partner?_ "

Ianto blinks once more."No, sir. Sorry, sir. I got sidetracked. I'm heading up now."

* * *

The alley the sighting occurred at is dingy and dark, despite it being the middle of the day.

The weather doesn't help with the atmosphere, not Ianto's mood. It's dull and wet and he wishes it were sunshine and clear skies just on the off-chance it might wake him up more. Or at least if it were windy or stormy, the energy in the air might transfer over to him. But it just feels as empty as he does.

"-and I'll go round the other side, okay?"

Ianto clears his throat and nods. He can get the gist of what Jack just said based on experience even if he missed half of it. Typical cutting the Weevil off at both ends approach. Ianto can do that.

Jack stalks off and Ianto tries to take a moment to clear his mind. But he only has a moment because Jack is relying on him. It's just a Weevil, and then Ianto can go back to the Hub and find something else to do to pass the time that's less energy-demanding. And then he can go home and just hope that when - _if_ \- he crashes tonight, it'll be a peaceful sleep.

He's not naive enough to believe that, though.

Ianto takes his first steps into the alley, focusing on the sounds around him. The only roads around them are empty and there's no one out walking. Weevils usually come out at night but Ianto guesses this place is suitable enough during the day time, though why a Weevil would want to be here is beyond him.

He tunes in to the sound of rustling next to a large pile of what looks and smells like trash bags. Ianto curses under his breath. He steps backwards so his back is against the wall but he still can't see around the pile of trash bags to the source of the noise. Typical. Today of all days, he's in the middle of a damn horror movie.

Keeping his back against the wall, Ianto takes another step towards the noise. Where is Jack? He should be at the other end of the alley by now, it's not that long. He steps closer again, just enough so he can see a dark blue material and okay, the Weevil is here and Jack is not. This will be fine.

" _Ianto, I've found the Weevil. You're in the wrong alley._ "

Ianto stops. Stares. His mouth opens and closes and he really wishes he had the mental capacity to deal with this right now. This isn't the first time they've ended up with more Weevils than they'd planned for. Two Weevils isn't anything they haven't handled before.

"Wait, Jack-"

The Weevil in front of Ianto snarls, and then pounces. Ianto barely has time to jump out of the way to dodge its fangs but it still manages to shove him hard against the wall.

Ianto's ribs erupt in fire and he only has enough control to diminish is cry of pain into a short grunt. " _Shit_ ," he hisses, head spinning. The bruises may be fading but his ribs have been a slower process and _this_ is one of the reasons he's avoided hunting with Jack.

" _Ianto, you good?_ "

Ianto doesn't have time to answer Jack right now. He forces himself to take a breath and reaches inside his pocket for the sedative. Desperate times and all.

Except his fingers barely clasp around the needle before he's shoved to the ground. He wheezes, the breath knocked out of him and barely manages to stop his head hitting the ground. The last thing he needs is to add to his healing concussion.

Ianto shoves his hands hard against the Weevil's shoulders but one hand misses and the Weevils hardly so much as stumbles onto its side. He yells out, frustrated and tired and just downright angry because this stupid Weevil shouldn't be beating him in a fight. He's fought so many Weevils so many times and a little tiredness shouldn't have this much control over him.

Just as the Weevil hauls itself up to attack again, it is suddenly pulled away. Ianto spots the flowing edges of Jack's coat out of the corner of his eye and knows he shouldn't, but lets himself relax. If it's his mind playing tricks on him then he probably deserves whatever the Weevil is going to do to him.

A hand appears in front of him, stretched out for Ianto to take. He blinks up, Jack staring down at him. " _Ianto_ ," Jack urges, sounding anything but frustrated. That makes one of them. "We haven't got all day."

Ianto does as he's told before Jack starts pushing him to tell him what's wrong. If Jack even knows something is wrong. _You just lost in one-on-one combat with a Weevil_ , he reminds himself. _Jack definitely knows something's up_.

Ianto doesn't realise he has his arm curled around his stores until Jack's eyes drift down a little towards his ribs. Jack raises a questioning eyebrow.

"I thought they'd healed more," he mumbles, barely an attempt at an explanation. "Guess I was wrong."

Jack stares at Ianto for a moment longer and Ianto almost expects him to push for more, but he just turns around and starts to walk away. "Come on," he orders. "Let's get these guys back to the Hub before they wake up."

Ianto brushes himself off and follows.

* * *

The pain from his ribs dulls as the day goes on.

At least Ianto thinks it does, but maybe he's just getting more tired. As the hours pass after his hunt with Jack, he feels more and more like he's walking in a haze. Like he isn't really in the Hub. Almost like he's floating.

He knows that's a bad thing. He knows that's a problem and he should go home and rest before something else goes wrong. But he's in the Hub now. He isn't out on a hunt, he isn't putting himself or his team in danger.

He's just making coffee.

Jack is holed back in the office. Ianto suspects he's still working through those papers and their hunt was some form of a distraction. Jack probably hoped for some light conversation out of Ianto, for a little bit of _fun_. Ianto couldn't focus for long enough to determine if that were the case.

He should feel disappointment, but he just feels numb.

He tries to blink the fog from his head. It's a futile effort and just makes him dizzy again. His hands are splayed across the counter in front of him, a bunch of half-made coffees waiting to be finished. He realises with a sharp inhale that his hands are the only things keeping him upright.

Ianto squeezes his eyes shut, trying to focus. Stars just dance in his vision though, making him feel more out of control. His heart pounds and he's not sure if it's panic or the overload of caffeine he's had.

When he opens his eyes and his vision swims, he realises it's definitely panic. It's panic because he can barely see, can barely make out Tosh sitting only a few feet away at her desk, can't even concentrate on any of the sounds in the Hub. Everything just echoes, just makes Ianto feel more like he's spinning even though he knows he isn't moving.

Ianto's stomach drops. He should have gone home. He should have bought some sleeping pills and hoped they would ease his night so he might get some undisturbed rest. He should have gone where he won't draw attention to himself, where his colleagues aren't going to find out that he's struggling with something that they've all gotten over. They've all forgotten what happened.

Why can't he?

He makes the mistake of trying to stand upright without the aid of his hands. His heart hammers in his chest, his legs and hands shake, and before he can think to call out to someone for help, his vision goes black.

* * *

Jack's head snaps up at the sound of something snapping and a loud thump.

He moves to look through his window but of course, his blinds are closed. He'd wanted space. So much for that.

He considers ignoring it, when he hears Tosh shout Ianto's name, and then she calls for Owen. Jack stands and hurries over to the door. He pulls it open, eyes immediately zoning in on where Tosh is kneeling and where Gwen is standing.

Where Ianto is lying, unmoving.

Heart in his throat, Jack rushes over, sliding to his knees next to Tosh at Ianto's head. "What happened?" he hisses, bringing his hand to Ianto's cheek. Deep down, a voice reminds him not to show so much affection, to reign it in a little. With Ianto lying unconscious in front of him for an unknown reason, Jack can't begin to care about that. He feels like he might throw up.

Tosh looks almost like she might cry and Gwen has her hand covering her mouth. "I didn't see," Tosh says. Her voice is shaking.

At that moment, Ianto stirs. Jack's stomach settles a little and he forces himself to smile as Ianto's eyes begin to open. "Shit," Ianto whines.

Jack huffs out a small laugh. He cups the back of Ianto's neck but when he feels something wet, he pulls his hand back instantly. It comes back red.

Jack turns his head immediately to should for Owen but Owen is just coming up the steps towards them. Apparently he didn't think anything serious actually happened because when he sees Ianto on the ground and the blood on Jack's hand, he's next to them in an instant.

"Where's the blood coming from?" Owen asks first.

Jack's hands tremble. He tries to push down his panic but Ianto still seems a little out of it, even as he starts pushing himself upright. Jack motions to Ianto's head, the base of his skull. He glances to his left. Ianto must have fallen backwards and hit the back of his head against the raised slab of ground. His stomach twists.

"Help me lift him?" It takes everything in Jack to keep his voice level, to keep a straight mind. To not completely overreact. Ianto will be fine, Owen will make sure of it.

Owen nods. Jack swings one of Ianto's arms around his shoulders and Owen does the same with the other. Together they stand and Ianto rises with them, a harsh groan coming from him.

Jack winces. "Sorry," he mumbles, curling his arm gently around Ianto's waist. It's for support, is what he'll say if anyone asks. Because it is, but he also needs it too. It's support for both of them.

He's mindful of Ianto's ribs as he and Owen slowly lead him to the med bay. Tosh and Gwen trail quietly behind, to the point that Jack forgets they're there. He's just doing his best not to look at the blood drying on his hand.

They sit Ianto down on the autopsy table. While Owen heads to grab something, Jack stands right in front of Ianto, hand again at the back of his neck. He doesn't care about the blood. He cares about the lines on Ianto's forehead, the signals that he's in pain. And Jack can't do much to stop the pain, but he can try to distract him while Owen figures out what to do.

Owen comes back over beside them and Jack takes half a step to the left, just to give him space.

"What happened?" Owen asks as he shines a torch in each of Ianto's eyes.

"I don't know," Ianto mumbles. His voice is groggy and he seems only half aware of the world around him. Jack resists the urge to reach for his hand. Everyone is here and Ianto probably wouldn't appreciate that. "I just... I think I just fainted."

Jack doesn't know if he's lying. He knows that Ianto seemed off on their hunt earlier, like he was focused completely on something else. He hadn't pushed him for answers, figured Ianto would let him know if it was anything serious. They've been talking to each other more recently and it seemed like something Ianto might bring up once everyone else had gone home. And if Ianto didn't bring it up, then Jack is learning to trust that it's something Ianto can handle on his own.

"Guess I hit my head on the way down," Ianto chuckles. There's no humour in his voice.

Jack pulls his hand away from Ianto's neck straight away. "Sorry," he says, voice low. "Am I hurting you?"

Ianto glances up at Jack. Jack's breath hitches at the dullness in his eyes. That wasn't there earlier, was it? "No," Ianto promises after a moment of silence. "I'm okay."

"I'll be the judge of that." Jack suddenly becomes aware of Owen's presence again and he takes another half step away so he's off to Ianto's side. Still right there, but he doesn't want to feel like he's getting in the way. Though Owen wouldn't be too shy to tell Jack to move out of the way if he needed to. "Lower your head."

Maybe it's the fact that Ianto doesn't seem fully present yet, maybe it's the knock to the head, but Jack doesn't argue when Ianto seems to decide that 'lower your head' means 'rest your forehead against Jack's shoulder while Owen inspects your injury'. He lays his hand gently at the small of Ianto's back.

He should have seen that something was wrong. He still doesn't know _what_ is wrong, but he should have noticed that there was something off. Ianto came in far too early, barely spoke, and seemed desperate to throw himself into work. Jack shouldn't have let him.

Ianto tenses against Jack as Owen gently presses against the base of his skull. With the way Ianto is bowed towards Jack and the angle Jack is at compared to the others watching on, no one sees when Jack reaches for Ianto's hand and links their fingers. He squeezes gently and Ianto squeezes back. It's weak, but at least Jack knows that at least a small part of Ianto is here.

"Alright," Owen says as he steps back. Ianto lifts his head, eyes glassy, and pulls his hand from Jack. "I don't think you've fractured your skull. But you've definitely got a concussion, on top of the one you got yourself last week."

Ianto groans again. His eyes slip shut, almost tiredly so. Jack shuffles closer to let Ianto subtly lean against him. A lot has happened today, it's no wonder he's tired.

"Now you know concussions aren't normally dangerous," Owen continues. He walks over to his drawers and starts grabbing a number of things. "But what with everything that happened at the Brecon Beacons being less than two weeks ago, I'd like someone to keep an eye on you tonight. Head injuries can worsen suddenly, as you know. Is there anyone that could do that, or have I got to pull an all-nighter again?"

"I can do it," Jack volunteers. Owen doesn't bat an eyelid but he feels the need to justify. "I can handle less sleep than the rest of you. We'll need you rested in case something goes wrong."

"I'm not gonna argue." Owen just shrugs and returns with gloves on and a needle in hand. "Painkillers. No doubt you're in a lot of pain. They'll make you drowsy but it's getting late, so-"

"No," Ianto immediately argues, shifting away from the needle. Jack braces his hand on the side of Ianto's arm, holding him steady. "Honestly, I'm fine. I don't need anything."

Owen just snorts. "Sure, Tough Guy. Come on, don't be a martyr."

Owen brings the needle to Ianto's arm but Ianto flinches away before he can make contact. "Seriously. Don't. I said I don't need it."

Jack senses the defensiveness in Ianto's voice. He turns to glance at Tosh and Gwen, who are still standing, waiting. "You two can go home." It's less of a suggestion and more of an order. "We'll be fine here."

If they say anything he doesn't listen because he's tuning back in on the 'conversation' between Ianto and Owen. It's more of an argument, really.

"-and your headache is only going to get worse. I don't see the problem, Ianto. It's just a painkiller mixed with a mild sedative."

"So give me the painkiller without the sedative, then." Ianto is tense again, permanently tense this time, it seems.

"The sedative is the issue, then?" Owen presses. Ianto is rigid against Jack. Jack just keeps his hand on Ianto's arm. "Are you having trouble sleeping? Is that what happened today?"

Ianto turns his head away, eyebrows furrowing. Jack knows he needs to just take the painkiller but he also wants to know what the problem is.

"Yan? What's going on?"

Ianto pushes the heel of his hand against his forehead, emitting a small groan. "Stop pushing," he whispers. "I'd just rather not sleep if I don't have to."

Jack can tell that Ianto's frustration is getting the better of him and that's the best they're going to get from him. "Just let him give you the painkiller," he says. He softly strokes Ianto's elbow and gently coaxes him to look up. "I'll be with you all night, remember? There's nothing to worry about." He adds a wink for good measure.

Ianto stares for a moment and Jack almost considers the fact that Ianto won't listen to him. That he won't trust him. But then Ianto nods slowly and Jack lets himself smile proudly.

"Thank you," Owen mutters and seemingly before Ianto can change his mind, he administers the painkiller. "The pain relief should be immediate. The sedative might take a little while longer and like I said, it's mild. If you've got strong willpower, I guess you could try to fight it. Wouldn't recommend it, though."

Owen discards the needle and grabs some swabs.

"Lower your head again."

Ianto does the same as the first time, forehead against Jack's shoulder. Jack wants to press his cheek to the top of Ianto's head. If Owen wasn't here, he might consider it. Instead he continues to rub slow, soft circles against Ianto's arm, even though he shouldn't be in pain any more.

Owen begins to clean the back of Ianto's head. He doesn't need to be too gentle but Jack still notices the lightness of his touches. "You can fall asleep tonight, but Jack will need to wake you up at least every two hours to make sure you're okay and you're not getting any worse. Obviously you won't feel pain, but if you feel any more pressure than you do right now, or if anything at all feels wrong or different then you need to tell him. You need to be completely honest because this can all go really wrong really fast. Head injuries are unpredictable. Like I said, don't be a martyr."

Ianto manages a small chuckle against Jack's shoulder, which Jack takes as a win. "I'll try not to be."

Owen movies away again but Ianto makes no move to lift his head. Owen discards the swabs and picks up some small, white strips. "I'm just gonna put on some of these strips, alright? They'll help the healing process."

Ianto just hums in response, leaning a little more against Jack. Jack wonders if he's falling asleep like this. With how tired he seems and now the sedative, Jack wouldn't be surprised if he was.

When Owen is finished he pulls back and Jack nudges Ianto gently to get him to raise his head. His eyes are still glazed over and he still looks exhausted but he doesn't look like he was about to fall asleep. Jack wonders if there's a reason for that.

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

Ianto glares and sighs, but answers. "Two. Are we done now?"

Owen pulls his gloves off and nods and begins to clean up. "'Why thank you for helping me, Owen. Thank you for fixing me up even though I won't tell you what happened because I want to be difficult and-'"

"Okay," Ianto whispers. He glances up at Jack, who's smirking. "Thank you, Owen. Seriously. I'm sorry-"

"Don't worry about it," Owen interrupts. He weighs Ianto off as he drops everything in his hands into the bin. "I don't really care, Ianto. You know me. Not one for the personal details."

Ianto just rolls his eyes. The action has him wincing, his gaze dropping back down to the floor. Jack steps closer to him, curving around him almost protectively. It's instinctive. A lot has happened today, so he isn't going to deny himself the opportunity to be close to him like this. Not after he missed all of the signs.

"If I may." Owen is stood next to them again and he's motioning to the stairs.

Jack's eyebrows shoot up. "Oh," he says. He glances down at Ianto, who is still staring at the ground. "Yeah, go on. Just keep your-"

"Keep my phone on me. Yeah, yeah," Owen grumbles. "I am the doctor, you know."

He walks away before Jack can answer. Not that Jack would say anything because he has his focus trained back on Ianto. He doesn't know what he's supposed to say here. He's curious - _worried_. He doesn't want to push Ianto because this is clearly something he's reluctant to talk about. Or maybe it was just because Owen was here, and now he'd be okay with opening up.

But they've been building trust, haven't they? And while Jack trusts Ianto to tell him eventually, he also hopes that Ianto trusts him enough that he'll talk if Jack asks him to. And he trusts Ianto to say 'no' if he's uncomfortable or he's not ready, just like Ianto should trust that Jack won't be upset if that's what happens.

"Hey," he whispers, nudging Ianto's knee. As Ianto raises his head, Jack dips his down a little, meeting Ianto halfway. Ianto shuts his eyes for a moment, sighing slightly and Jack nuzzles his nose against Ianto's, forcing his own eyes to stay open. "What's going on?"

He says it softly. There's no urgency in his voice, no demand. Just a little encouragement, a little kindness. And hopefully there's something in there that reminds Ianto of that trust.

Ianto just stares for a little while, over Jack's shoulder at the wall behind him. Jack waits in silence. He's in no rush. They'll take it slowly, if that's what Ianto needs. Or they won't talk about this at all tonight and Jack can just take Ianto to bed and he can get him to sleep because he looks even more exhausted than he did five minutes ago.

Eventually, Ianto meets Jack's eyes. Ianto's eyes aren't guarded any more. They're glistening - tears? - and they're filled with pain and fear and a whole lot of things that Jack doesn't want to see.

"Not here." His voice is quieter than Jack expects but full of desperation nonetheless.

Jack steps out of his way immediately so Ianto can stand. "Okay," he agrees. He hopes his voice isn't as eager as he feels. He lays his hand gently on Ianto's shoulder as Ianto slowly stands up so he can catch him ifhe falls but he isn't in Ianto's space if he doesn't need to be. "You go ahead. I'll just be a minute."

He reaches his hand out as Ianto nods and begins to walk away, just in case. Ianto wobbles a little and he seems a tad unsteady, but he's handled worse. Then he's stumbling up the stairs and around the corner and Jack takes a moment to get his bearings. To breathe. To stop his mind racing as he unconsciously tries to figure out what is wrong with Ianto because Ianto will tell him. He doesn't need to theorise.

He takes a moment longer, more to give Ianto time to get comfortable if he wants, before he gives in to his curiosity and follows. As he walks, he turns off every light and until just the dim lights in his office are all that are left. Then he turns those off too and he stands in the darkness, the silence, until he finds the strength to continue moving towards the ladder to his bunker.

He toes off his shoes, a little surprised that Ianto's aren't there but he doesn't dwell on that. He just climbs down the ladder, expecting to find Ianto sitting on the bed. He isn't, and Jack scans the small room to see that he's actually standing next to a wall, staring at it as if he is staring out of a window.

Jack doesn't say anything, yet. He pulls off his suspenders and undoes his first couple of shirt buttons. When it becomes clear Ianto isn't going to say anything, he sits on the edge of the bed and glances over.

"Yan? You okay?"

Ianto doesn't move. His arms are folded tight against his chest and Jack can see the tenderness in his shoulders from where he's sitting.

Jack weighs his options. He could wait. He could wait as long as he has to for Ianto to finally start talking, but that's not a given. He could wait forever and Ianto could somehow stay silent for longer. Jack doesn't want to force him into talking but he isn't sure how much he can coax before Ianto begins to feel like he can't say no to this conversation.

A few seconds of deliberation later, Jack stands and makes his way over to Ianto. He stands behind him and doesn't let himself hesitate before he wraps his arms gently around Ianto's waist and rests his chin on Ianto's shoulder. His hold is tender even though he knows Owen's painkillers are strong enough that Ianto can't even feel discomfort right now.

Jack begins to gently sway from side to side, moving Ianto with him. "Earth to Ianto," he muses. Ianto relaxes a little against Jack, leaning his head on the side of Jack's. Still no reply, though. Instead, all Jack gets is a soft exhale. "We don't have to talk. You could get some rest. You look-"

Ianto tenses again, harshly shrugging Jack off him. Jack does his best not to be hurt. This isn't about him right now, not when there's clearly something bothering Ianto.

Ianto shoots Jack a glance before averting his eyes again. "Sorry," he whispers. His voice breaks.

Jack fights the urge to hold him again. "We don't _have_ to talk, but... You know I'll listen."

It's not a question. It's a reminder, a promise so that Ianto can't push Jack away because he's scared. He can't believe that Jack will judge him or get tired of him (because after everything, how _could_ Jack get tired of him?). And Jack knows Ianto doesn't believe that, but if he's feeling vulnerable right now then that might not matter.

"I know." It takes Ianto a minute to talk. "I know, it's just... I don't want to make something out of nothing. It'll pass. I'm fine."

Jack reaches for Ianto's hand and tugs him gently towards the bed. He's half surprised when Ianto doesn't pull away and instead sits next to Jack, still facing away from him a little but this is progress.

Jack smiles softly, even if Ianto doesn't see. "You don't have to be," he promises. He lets go of Ianto's hand and pulls lightly at the collar of Ianto's jacket. "Not here. Not if you don't want to be."

Ianto shifts so Jack can pull his jacket off slowly. He doesn't tense much but Jack can still sense his hesitance. "I just... it's stupid."

"Humour me."

Ianto swallows. Jack hangs his jacket on the back of a chair near them. Ianto stays silent while Jack moves closer, hands zoning in on Ianto's cufflinks. "I can't- I _can't_ get it out of my head, Jack. I thought it would have stopped by now, but it won't stop, it _won't_ , it-"

"Hey, hey," Jack interrupts. He discards the cufflinks and grabs Ianto's shaking hands, forcing the man to turn to him a little more, to look at him. "Calm down. You're safe here. What won't stop?"

Ianto nods a little and breathes for a minute. Jack waits patiently, this thumbs stroking soft circles over the backs of Ianto's hands, just behind his knuckles. Eventually, Ianto exhales. Still shaky, but a little more stable. "The nightmares." He chances a glance at Jack, eyes wide, fearful. Like he's expecting Jack to turn around and laugh. Jack just frowns. "I know, it's stupid. Everyone else seems to be past it but here I am, still having these stupid dreams. But they feel so _real_ , Jack, and I know they're not but it's like I'm right _there_ and I can't stop it, and they've got the baseball bat and they're- they're _tenderising_ me and I'm so _sure_ I'm going to die-"

"But you didn't," Jack reminds him. He's right next to Ianto now, personal space not a consideration, and he's curving his hand round the back of Ianto's neck and pulling his head down onto Jack's shoulder. "You didn't die. We got you out of there, remember? _I_ got you out of there and you're safe now. They can't get to you."

Ianto laughs Welty, but it quickly morphs into a quiet sob. "I _know_ that," he insists. His voice is shaking, just like he is. "But that doesn't stop them. I don't know _how_ to stop them."

Ianto pulls away, wiping harshly at his eyes. Jack's stomach drops. Ianto didn't just look exhausted today in the med bay. That was just when Jack started paying enough attention to notice. This has been going on for over a week and Jack has been too caught up in everything else to notice. It's just that Tosh and Owen and Gwen... they all seem to be doing okay. They've been shaken up, sure, but they seemed to have moved on, or at least shifted their focus back to their current work.

Jack just assumed Ianto had done the same.

"You think they make you weak?" Jack questions, incredulous. "Ianto, it's okay to struggle. The others... Gwen has Rhys to go home to. And even though Rhys doesn't know what we do, he does know how to look after her. And Tosh and Owen - well, they've been in the field long enough to know how to handle these things themselves. How to push through it. But even they find it hard, sometimes. They just know how to find a little comfort in each other, even if it's just that of a friend." He lifts his hand to the side of Ianto's head and strokes his fingers through the short strands, gentle and soothing, he hopes. Ianto pushes against the feeling like he's searching for more of it and Jack isn't surprised. Not if he's dreaming that. Dreams full of loneliness and terror. "You're not weaker than them just because this is hitting you harder. You were terrified for your life and that's not something most people just get over. I wish you'd told me so I could've tried to help you, but I understand why you didn't. Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me now."

"Give yourself a little credit, Jack Harkness," Ianto says. He tries for a laugh but it's slow and tired. "You're kind of hard to resist."

Jack presses a kiss to Ianto's forehead. "When did you last sleep through the whole night?"

Swallowing thickly, Ianto shrugs. He turns away from Jack slightly, instinctively. "Almost two weeks."

Jack laughs this time, disbelieving. How did he not notice? Now that he thinks about it, he can pinpoint every time Ianto came in far too early, couldn't hold a conversation, made a mistake he wouldn't normally make. Jack had just put it down to stress. Overworking. Something that meant that he could pretend it wasn't something more serious so he couldn't feel hurt that Ianto wasn't coming to him.

"Get comfortable, then," Jack says, standing. He unbuttons the rest of his shirt while Ianto stares up at him, eyebrows furrowed. "You have to sleep, Ianto. Owen sedated you, remember? You don't have to fight it."

"Jack..." Ianto mumbles, shaking his head.

Jack sighs. He steps in front of him and lays his hands on Ianto's shoulders. After a second, Ianto looks up at him and swallows. "I'll be here," Jack promises. He gives Ianto's shoulders a quick squeeze. "I can't promise that the nightmares will stop, but I promise you won't wake up alone. I'll be right beside you. You trust me?"

"Of course," Ianto answers, no hesitation.

Jack's heart swells at the lack of hesitation, the fact that Ianto didn't even need to think before answering. It's especially overwhelming after everything they've been through, the mistakes they've both made, yet they've still somehow managed to make it to this point. There's still so far to go, but this is still progress that Jack wasn't expecting to make so quickly.

He smiles, unable to really stop himself if he wanted to. He brings his hand to Ianto's cheek and strokes gently before he speaks. "Then do this for me. Let me try to take care of you. _Please_."

Ianto stares for a moment longer and Jack can see the conflict in his eyes. It only lasts for that moment though, because then Ianto is shaking his head incredulously and muttering, S _ee? Irresistible_ , under his breath and he's standing next to Jack and pulling off his shoes.

Jack's smile morphs into one of pride as he and Ianto both undress down to their undershirts and boxers. _This isn't the time for intimacy_ , Jack reminds himself so he doesn't undress completely. Then he waits. Waits for Ianto to cross his arms and look lost, just for a second, before a small nod from Jack has him slowly climbing into the bed.

Jack swallows, lays down next to Ianto who doesn't seem all that relaxed yet. "Chances are you won't have a nightmare tonight," Jack tries, hoping he's at least a little reassuring. "I have to wake you up in an hour and a half."

He watches as Ianto takes a deep breath, seemingly trying to let that wash over him. To calm himself. It doesn't seem to work because his eyes shoot open not a minute later and he stares up at the roof.

Jack shuffles a little closer and leans up on his elbow. "Can I do anything else?"

Clenching his jaw, Ianto appears to let the request linger. Just as Jack thinks he isn't going to answer, Ianto mumbles, "Can you just..." He beckons Jack closer and Jack takes the hint.

He curls up beside Ianto as Ianto turns to face away from him. Then he snakes his arm around Ianto's waist and pulls him flush against his chest.

As Jack nuzzles his nose behind Ianto's ear, for the first time tonight, he finally feels the other man begin to relax.


End file.
